You wacky bunch of people have named my imaginary pageant toddler.

I present to you Paisleigh Isabella Grace, 3 years old.  She’s blonde & blue eyed & came pre-spray-tanned to keep me from having to worry with that.  (I had an auto dealership use a shade called “suburban pageant toddler” — it’s got a 10 year guarantee and by that time, she’ll be aging out of the pageant circuit anyway.)

Her interests are sparkles and world peace.  She wants to be a supermodel or Miss America when she grows up, plans to save all the whales (which she will then recycle for dolphins) and do something for poor people somewhere.  Her special talent is boxing with other pageant toddlers.

Stay tuned.  Her first pageant is soon and it’s the Battlestar Tiara Doll Classic — full glitz AND LASERS!


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